Virtual Moment of Joy!
Cheerfully brought to you by:
KC Christensen-Lang, Joyologist / Success Coach
November 2006 - Thanksgiving Edition
 

FAN MAIL OF THE MOMENT

"As much as we ALL love (and live by) the "e-touches," to me there's an altogether different message, something that feels extra reassuring, friendlier and more REAL somehow, that comes from a stamped newsletter and handwritten note…like yours. Thank you, KC!" Mary McCord, Communications Director, American Institute of Holistic Theology, Birmingham, Alabama

"My session with KC was like "having a massage of the soul". KC is awesome! We had an informative, fast moving, exciting two way conversation but it was all about me and KC was fantastic about following up to see if I was carrying through. If you have thought about treating yourself, give yourself this wonderful gift!"  Carolyn McGee, Owner-Broker, Buyer's Brokers of the Seacoast- Hall-McGee Realtors, LLC

"Hey KC, Thanks so much for our coaching call this morning, and for following up with me so quickly! I benefited from our talk in ways I don’t even have words for yet; I can feel something having shifted…Wonderful!!! I am going to follow up on every single one of the links you sent; I just had a session with a client that knocked her socks off and it blended in so well with feeling confident enough to go out and advertise what I do! Thanks." Licia Berry, Owner, www.GoofyGoddess.com 

TURKEY OF THE MOMENT

The pro football team had just finished their daily practice session when a large turkey came strutting onto the field. While the players gazed in amazement, the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout. Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and ran right through the defensive line. When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, "You're terrific!!! Sign up for the season, and I'll see to it that you get a huge bonus."

"Forget the bonus," the turkey replied, "All I want to know is, does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?"

QUOTE OF MOMENT

"Hold on to your dreams for they are the stuff of which reality is made. It is through our dreams that we maintain the possibility of a better, more meaningful life." -- Leo Buscaglia, Lecturer, Author

COACHING CORNER OF THE MOMENT

As a Success Coach, I hear all about the ups and downs of my clients in their personal and professional lives. Email me your concerns and we’ll do our best to assist you! This month, you asked…

I am wasting a lot of time at work and don’t get as much done as I want. Where does the day go?

Coaching tips of the moment: GET FOCUSED! Get clarity about how you spend your day. Put down the top three priorities for that day on one sheet and do those before you get overwhelmed by the other endless Things to Do” list. Start setting boundaries and learn to say no. Follow the time management golden rule: DO, DELEGATE, DUMP. Keep the casual conversation with other staff to a minimum until you have a head-start on your work. Close your door when you need quiet and put up a humorous sign. Do NOT open email until you finish that important project. Have someone else grab your phone or let it go to voicemail until that important task is complete. Contact me if you need help with time management strategies.

I have clients yet I feel my business is not growing as fast as it could. Any ideas for growing my business?

Coaching tips of the moment: BUILD RELATIONSHIPS! When was the last time you connected with past customers? People buy from those they know, like and respect. I have clients who have thousands of customers in their files/databases already, yet they haven’t contacted them for years. This is a huge asset for your business and one you should not let slip through your fingers. Send them a note or postcard. A phone call, a card, emailed newsletters, conduct a survey, focus group; get in touch with them again. Tell them how much you appreciate them, offer them a discount, update them on services and products, ask them why they stopped coming in, say you miss them, etc. Re-establish these relationships. A satisfied customer is a returning customer. Word of mouth referrals are the best kind. There are many positive ways to reach out to potential clients as well and grow your business…and a positive, honest, caring attitude, great reputation, fantastic products, prompt follow-up, and fair prices is a wonderful place to start.

Thanksgiving “Divorce” Of The Moment

A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says,  "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.”

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son bellows.

“We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father explains. "I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister in Chicago and tell her, okay?"

Frantic, the son calls his older sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'LL take care of this!"

She calls her father immediately and screams, "You are NOT getting divorced, Dad. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow to talk some sense into you and Mom. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME? We’ll be there tomorrow!” and hangs up.

The old man calmly puts the receiver down and turns to his smiling wife next to him. "Okay," he says grinning, "they're both coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."

NEED A UNIQUE HOLIDAY PRESENT?

How about my new book? I’m thrilled to be in good company as the co-author of “Speaking of Success” with the world-renown (Chicken Soup for The Soul) guru Jack Canfield and bestselling authors Ken Blanchard (One Minute Manager) and Stephen Covey (7 Habits of Highly Effective People.) I’d be glad to autograph it for you or that special someone.

Pre-order at only $14.95 until December 15th at www.ToolsForPositiveLiving.com, call our office at (207) 361-2084, or email happinessis@toolsforpositiveliving.com. Once it hits Amazon.com, the price will be $19.95. Volume discounts are also available.

Click on the book on the left for more details.

OPTIMISM OF THE MOMENT

We are always promoting the power of optimism vs. pessimism to our clients and friends. Do you know it takes three times as much energy to be negative as it does to be positive? We believe in the Glass Half Full philosophy and one reason is that you will see new opportunities for personal growth and business success.

Here’s an light-hearted example, courtesy of Wayne Cipullo Director of Corporate Development of Regal Limousine Service…but oh so true!

Two shoe salespeople were sent to Africa to open up new markets.
Three days after arriving, one salesperson called the office and said, "I'm returning on the next flight. Can't sell shoes here. Everybody goes barefoot."
At the same time the other salesperson sends an excited email to the factory, "The prospects are unlimited. Nobody wears shoes here!"

BOOMER HUMOR OF THE MOMENT

Artist Tracy Taravade, likes to lightly poke fun at us female baby boomers with her new humorous greeting card line. Check ‘em out at her site: www.cascadegreetings.com.

TELEGRAM OF THE MOMENT

A brunette is inspecting a bull at the stockyard for the family’s ranch and wants to buy it. The man tells her he’ll sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to town to send her sister a telegram to share the good news.

In the telegraph office, she says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."

The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word."

Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word.

After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, "Send her the word "comfortable."

The operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word, "comfortable?"

The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde. The word's big. She'll read it VERY slowly...........Com-for-DA-bull”

SONGS OF THE MOMENT
Courtesy of fellow Coach Linda Dessau

As you know, our company Happiness Is…promotes powerful tools for positive living and are always looking for ways to reduce your stress. Here is a great stress-zapping poll on "what song helps you to sing out your stress" that may prove helpful to you as we approach the holiday season. Check it out! http://www.singoutyourstress.com/2006/08/top_10_songs_to.html 

HUMOROUS ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE MOMENT

Here are statements that actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced during church services.

"Ladies, remember the upcoming rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands."

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge- now - Up Yours."

"Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get."

BEING PROPER FOR THE MOMENT

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such FOWL language

SMART KID OF THE MOMENT

Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving,"
little Timothy wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."

BUSINESS-BUILDING SERVICE OF THE MOMENT

One of our most popular new services, is PR Coaching and publicity/media consulting. I am honored to be working with small business owners, speakers, authors, entrepreneurs, coaches and consultants around the country. Would You Like A Free ONE HOUR PR PHONE SESSION to see how I can grow your business? Promote your product or services? Get you more media coverage? Increase the publicity for your book? Edit your writing?

"Oh MY GOSH! I went over my edited press release with a small group and we touched on a couple of the points you mentioned and well...I feel like a coach who just had his players cover him with 30 gallons of Gatorade... WOW!"

"KC, thank you, I will have to soak up everything you suggested...there's alot. It's rare that I see the energy unleashed in your reply...OF COURSE I'M LOVIN IT!" James Smith, Coach of A Life Of Possibility

For a more comprehensive PR package, my awesome Virtual Assistant Darbie and I have joined forces to promote your business and move you forward in a powerful, easy way. Stop drowning in paperwork and bogging down with clerical tasks and focus only on what you love to do! If you’d like to work smarter not harder and reduce your stress, then contact us! The Dynamic Duo: Two Pros For One Price. FREE Session! www.DynamicDuoPR.com 

MONEY-MAKING BOOK OF THE MOMENT

If you haven’t checked out this unique business book yet, what ya waiting for??! Based on the multiple streams of passive income and making money while you sleep concept, it is chock full of ideas on how to grow your business quickly and work smarter not harder. A quick, easy read, this book will make you laugh out loud, and fill your mind with lots of ways to gain new customers. I work closely with these two fabulous authors and am a licensee of their thought-provoking program so I know how good it is! Click on the book on the left for more details.

QUESTION TO PONDER FOR THE MOMENT:
How can you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

JOKE OF THE MONTH:

Three friends were asked this question:  "When you're in your casket, and your friends and family are mourning over you, what would you like them to say?"
Bernie replied: "I'd like them to say that I was a wonderful husband, a good business man and a loving father."
Henry commented: "I would like them to say I was a fantastic teacher who made a huge difference in people's lives."
Sam said: "I'd like them to say, "Look, he's moving!"

TEAM-BUILDING RESOURCE OF THE MOMENT

I head out to company sites all over the country to provide team-building retreats, staff training, stress reduction and laughter programs, how to use humor as a tool and prevent hardening of the attitudes. I was delighted to conduct a team-building Retreat for the Fish & Wildlife Service employees recently. Let me know if I can offer a customized program for YOUR company.

Or if you want to present a program or activity yourself, I'm now recommending this site to everyone I know who needs to improve employee morale or jazz up some staff training or is in the field of leadership, teaching and training. At the TeachMeTeamwork.com website, you'll find team building games which include videos, color photos, complete activity write-ups, downloadable directions, team theory articles, and audio interviews with leaders in the field of team and leadership development. Just click on the graphic below to visit!

QUESTIONABLE MARRIAGE OF THE MOMENT

A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman replies, "I'll miss you..."

DIFFERENCES OF THE MOMENT

Q: What is the difference between men and women?
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.

IF WOMEN CONTROLLED THE WORLD FOR A MOMENT

WRITING OPPORTUNITY OF THE MOMENT

Reader's Digest magazine is looking for hilarious true stories from the workplace for our All In a Day's Work humor section. Has anything happened at the office that made you, a client or someone you know laugh? Maybe you overheard a quirky conversation, got a ridiculous e-mail or had a self-defeating resume come across your desk. If so, we want to hear about it. Do you work with the public? What are some of the oddest requests or conversations you've had? Travel agencies, human resources, public relations firms, government, military, medicine -- whatever your occupation, if you have a funny true story, send it by e-mail. If they publish your story, they'll pay you $100-300. (Of course we'd love to see those stories too to share with your fellow Virtual Moment of Joy readers...we'll pay you in laughter and undying gratitude! ~ KC

Contact: Andy Simmons by Dec. 31: Email: humorstories@rd.com  No phone calls.

TRUE QUESTIONS OF THE MOMENT

LETTERS “DEAR ABBY” ADMITTED SHE WAS AT A LOSS TO ANSWER

Dear Abby, You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?

Dear Abby, I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now how do I get out?

Dear Abby, I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boy friend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby, I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.

Dear Abby, I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby, My mother is mean and short tempered. I think she is going through mental pause.

TOASTERS OF THE MOMENT

If Web designers made toasters, they would include pop-ups.

If the Highway Patrol made toasters, the slot would be large enough for a donut.

If Kentucky Fried Chicken made toasters, every slice would come out extra crispy.

If Las Vegas made toasters, you'd lose your bread but have fun anyway.


SONGS OF THE 60'S REVISITED FOR A MOMENT
Courtesty of Steve Wilson Cheerman of the Bored, www.worldlaughtertour.com

Due to the passage of nearly 4 decades since their hit songs release, some surviving musicians have revised the following "Boomer" songs of the '60s:

1. The Bee Gees --- How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.
2. Bobby Darin --- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.
3. Ringo Starr --- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.
4. Roberta Flack --- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face.
5. Johnny Nash --- I Can't See Clearly Now.
6. Paul Simon --- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver
7. The Commodores --- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.
8. Marvin Gaye --- Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.
9. Leo Sayer --- You Make Me Feel Like Napping.
10. The Temptations --- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone.
11. Tony Orlando --- Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.
12. Helen Reddy --- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.
13. Leslie Gore --- It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.
14. Willie Nelson --- On the Commode Again

COOL SAVINGS OF THE MOMENT
Courtesy of Andrea Lee

As you know, we're always looking for ways to help you make money AND save it! I just learned of another great site (funny too!) to do just that.  Go to www.FatFingers.com. Here you will find thousands of items on ebay that no one is bidding on, because the person who put it up for auction misspelled the word...so you can bid on it for alot less! People have purchased items for hundreds of dollars less than it normally would have gone for!

Type in an item you are looking for; everything from books, office equipment, to toys, electronic device or car. Select the ebay site you want it to search ( www.ebay.com for US, www.ebay.ca for Canada, www.ebay.co.uk for UK) and click FIND. A new window will open up. In this new window, you'll see ebay search results including all possible mispelt variations of what you are looking for. (If the window doesn't open up, click on the link directly below the search field in which you typed in).

A fellow coach just spotted a digital camera for $150, which normally retails for $449! Check it out!

READ OF THE MOMENT

Need something worthwhile to read as the weather begins to change? Then sign up for our FREE "Powerful Tools For Positive Living" newsletter sent right to your home or office every other month. CLICK HERE

CHUCKLE OF THE MOMENT

Did a smile appear on your face? At least ONCE? If so, please FORWARD our “Virtual Moment of Joy” to someone whom you appreciate….they’ll be most grateful that you brightened their holiday season! And so will we…the more the merrier! Thanks for joining us…send in those puns, jokes and cartoons…and remember WE GO THE EXTRA SMILE!

BEST WISHES OF THE MOMENT

  MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME TRUE THIS HOLIDAY SEASON!

                                      HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

      
KC Christensen-Lang, Success Coach/Joyologist
PR Consultant/Publicist/Speaker/Trainer
Multiple Streams of Income / Make Money While You Sleep Licensee
Owner/CEO, HAPPINESS IS...
(207) 361-2084
www.ToolsForPositiveLiving.com
www.DynamicDuoPR.com
Free Coaching or PR/Publicity session, Free "Powerful Tools" Newsletter, Free "Virtual Moment of Joy" ezine, Free Conference Lines at: www.happytalk.freeconferencecenter.com